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Read it and Weep

Dec 17, 2014

It's a tradition in the United States for movie studios to pump out good enough Christmas movies every year. Since ABC Family's motto is "Good Enough", they're no exception.

Desperately Seeking Santa is a half-assed Christmas rom-com from 2011 wherein a cold-hearted business woman is melted by a sexy Santa with abs. For...

Dec 12, 2014

Remember childhood? That was fun, right? Except the parts that weren't? That's how the 80s cartoon Duck Tales is too.

Based on a reformed Scrooge McDuck and his three great nephews Hewis, Lewis, and Dewis, Duck Tales is a classic mass-produced Disney animated show with 60 episodes in each of its two seasons. It's really...

Dec 3, 2014

The Truth about Charlie is a remake of the 1963 film Charade mashed up with Francois Truffaut's 1960 film Shoot the Piano Player. If you were guessing that those two movies shouldn't be mashed up, you were right.

Truth follows the ex-wife(?) of a murdered spy(?) and her new boyfriend(?) a criminal(?). Really, it's a...

Nov 26, 2014

If you love the Hunger Games, then you must be excited about the final movie! Too bad, because Lionsgate split it in half so you can pay twice as much and get a bunch of filler and an anticlimax! So get ready to half enjoy Mockingjay Part 1

In the future, wars will be fought through child-actors on TV making commercials...

Nov 19, 2014

In the final installment of the Hunger Games trilogy (of books, all movie trilogies are now 15 episodes long), Suzanne Collins brings the revolution in for a landing. But it's a rocky one if you're not a fan of weird politics, dumb leaders, and moping teenagers.

Mocking Jay features the climax of the revolution that our...